Work, life and things in between – Day 89 – Go big and colorful!
So there it was, the realization that writing is good to my soul and something I need to integrate into my life seriously. DA!
55 years it took me to get here! In school, my best topic was writing essays. Throughout my career, each, and I mean every single one of the personality types, career assessment tools, skills assessment etc., (and there have been a few), from the 2 minute test you pick up from a newspaper left behind on an airport seat to the sophisticated software tools, all mentioned that my interests and talent are around communication, verbal put preferably written, arts and music.
It is a little embarrassing for me to say this. Publicly I mean. Typically when you say arts you imply talent. Always. In my opinion that is. Being talented in the business world is often a result of hard work. Hard work I can do. Being talented in the artistic world, for me, results from being gifted on top of producing hard work.
How many people are comfortable to stand up and say I am gifted? I am not. Comfortable that is…as for gifted, I don’t know but I have a hunch I am going to try and find out.
So, in preparation for my certification that was to take place the following week, I completed the latest on line assessment which told me, not surprisingly, that writing is a field of interest for me.
I can be slow on the intake sometimes, but I think I got it now!
In my wildest dreams I see me sitting down at a writing table, facing a window, bathing in the sunlight writing, writing, writing….. I know, somewhat of a romantic view of an otherwise demanding exercise…but prince charming does not necessarily show up on a white horse nowadays…he may have been transformed into a great career or a personal passion! sorry, outsourcing is not limited to widgets!
I have journals after journals piled up in my filing cabinet full of reflections, thoughts, observations….I have 2 or 3 unfinished, some barely started books filed away in my computer…To this day, writing is a luxurious, frivolous act. It is something I do after all “my work” is done.
How can I turn the tables? How can writing become a priority? If I could make a living from it, would it become a priority? or should I look at this the other way around? If I made it a priority, then could I make a living at it? and what if making a living at it was not the right measure? what if I redefined success to mean something else?
This is all kind of cool actually because I can make this anything I want it to be. Success is whatever I define it to be. Pretty powerful. Whether it is to look at a printed version of my book sitting on my coffee table and thinking “I did it” or whether it is making it on the Best Sellers list, success is whatever I want it to be.
Still, to believe that writing can somehow contribute to support my financial needs is to believe that I can be the Prima Ballerina, the Top Golfer at the US Open or the gold medalist at the Olympics…it is to dream big.
What is the point of dreaming small you might ask?
Regardless of the outcome though, I will do it. I will post, publish, sell, draw, give away, stuff it in cereal boxes, somehow I will share my writing. It is my offering. Let’s at least start with that and remember that it is not about how late I am coming into this process but rather about how much more remains to be done.
Hours and hours of delight (or agony) in front of me. “ To day 90.