Work, life and things in between – Day 57- Show authenticity!
In the Career section of The Globe today is an article on conversation patterns. The author goes on to explain that conversations must be structured: have a topic, a defined audience, a goal , the whole nine yards.
He lists 12 types of conversation and how to lead them: the connector, the influencer, the mediator…give me a break!
Where did this disease of formatting everything come from? Why is it that we find value and comfort in setting rules and tips for everything? Are there people out there so desperate that they need a reference manual to hold a conversation? What is the value of a conversation set on a template??
As a child, other than on school days, my days were structured that way: I would wake up to a warm breakfast already set on the table. After breakfast I would get dressed and I knew where to find my clothes; neatly folded in my set of drawers. The selection was mine. Then I would go outside and play.
When my stomach started to growl, it was usually time for a meal. You knew the day had ended and it was time to come in when the porch light was on. That’s it. This is how much structure we had.
No fancy toys, no already made up kitchen sets, nursing kits, no on and off switches. We made it all up. Most of the time, all we had were rocks, high grass, shovels, pails, bicycles, skipping ropes…and even that must have been too much given how many times I managed to lose some of them. ( I remember losing a brand new pair of shoes…lime green, ugly as sin…maybe this is why I lost them..but anyway, I had not worn them yet…just taken them to the pool on a hot July day and came home without them……Somehow I’m sure my Mom remembers that one too !)
How my generation became the parents who needed to have a Fisher Price version of everything in life for their kids? I don’t know. I blame some of today’s article on that.
I resisted that as much as I could in bringing my own children up but you know, the Jones’ are a truly convincing bunch.
So that day, when I read about how to have a conversation, I thought that our children should have gone out and played outside some more. Figure things out on their own. Today they may not need a manual to address someone.
Just a thought….among many! To day 58.